


Technoblade vs Wikipedia (and Wilbur)

by ChipperChemical



Series: Dream SMP stuff [2]
Category: SMPEarth, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Gen, I think I spelt that wrong, Inspired by a writing prompt on IG, I’m convinced that Techno is a cryptid, Mostly just dialogue practise, They are lads, Wilbur this whole fic be like 👁👄👁, boys, fluff??
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-16
Updated: 2020-08-16
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:40:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25936828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChipperChemical/pseuds/ChipperChemical
Summary: Wilbur has a few questions that Wikipedia can’t answer, so he goes straight to the source.
Relationships: Dave | Technoblade & Wilbur Soot
Series: Dream SMP stuff [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2181660
Comments: 3
Kudos: 585





	Technoblade vs Wikipedia (and Wilbur)

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by a writing prompt by @_writing_prompts_ on Instagram. This was written and posted in the same hour shhhhhh.

“I have a question for you.” 

Techno glanced up from his writing to look at Wilbur analytically, scanning his stoic expression and hardened eyes before letting himself go back to the paper in front of him — he’d been drafting a letter to Tommy about a potential trade-off which could help him in the long run, when Wilbur let himself into the room uninvited, slamming his hands on the dark oak desk to exaggerate his point, not that it swayed Techno.

“You still have questions for me.” It was more of a statement than a question, but Wilbur nodded once anyway, either ignoring or not noticing the judgement behind Techno’s dark grey eyes, “Even after reading some of my Wikipedia articles?”

“Not ‘some’.” Wilbur pushed himself off of the desk, standing steadily before Techno, who was still writing somewhat in chicken-scratch, “ _All_.”

Looking up at that, Techno took note of the glared determination glazed over Wilbur’s behaviour, the slightly tensed knuckles and lifted shoulders, not to mention his set jaw and harsh eyes. After a moment of consideration, Techno set his pen down fully, abandoning his brainstorming in favour of Wilbur’s company.

“You must speak a lot of languages.” Techno snarked, taking in Wilbur’s briefly shifting expression as he was taken aback by the quip. It was truly a feat how the Brit hadn’t gotten used to the comments, Techno mused, smirking involuntary.

“Wrong again. Google Translate—“ Techno snickered, resting his head on his hand as Wilbur cut himself off, “—Quit changing the subject!”

“Right, right, your question.” Reminding them both of why Wilbur was there in the first place, Techno composed himself, clearing his throat and beginning to feel uncomfortable beneath Wilbur’s stare. The combination of being stared at (which he should really be accustomed to, but he wasn’t), plus his usually-soft friend acting so cold, made for an all-around unpleasant experience, “Continue.”

“I’ve read every single Wikipedia article on you, Technoblade.” Techno was tempted to snark about his ‘full name’ being used, but bit back, “Can you explain to me why not one of them tells the truth?”

“I’ve no idea what you mean.” Techno picked his pen up again, donning this conversation insignificant enough to have while he did other things, which Wilbur despised. Despite his words, Techno clearly knew what Wilbur was talking about, but the Brit decided to humour him anyway.

“The English article claims that your full name is Roman Blade, and I know that’s not true, even if I don’t know your legitimate name, since you wouldn’t use ‘Blade’ twice. The Norwegian one says that you’re forty years old. The Brazilian one says you’re a woman. And those are just a few of the notable ones!” Wilbur exclaimed, gesturing vaguely as if he expected Techno to be watching him, “None of them are entirely true! Some got close, but nothing! _How_?”

“Wilbur.” Techno hesitated before setting his pen down yet again, looking to Wilbur deadly, “I don’t go around letting people gather information on me. Even the slightest detail could lead to my downfall, you know how anxious I am about this. Wikipedia is one of my greatest enemies, trying to get all of these details about my past and my personal life. These people only need to know my name, and to fear me. I won’t let these fiends write articles about me.”

“But how? How did you spread so much misinformation?” Wilbur questioned, and _god, Techno was beginning to get tired of this interrogation_. Heaving an obvious sigh, Techno ran a hand through his pink hair, stopping just short of his crown.

“If I told you, I’d have to kill you.” Wilbur stepped back, and Techno chuckled, “I’m kidding. I have ‘ _connections_ ’, people who know how to bend rules and systems. You know I don’t like getting my hands dirty.”

“You pay people to spread misinformation and edit Wikipedia articles for you?”

“Who said anything about payment?”

Wilbur laughed softly, unsure if Techno was joking or not until the American grinned himself, joining with the laughter. They stayed like that for a moment, content in each other’s company, until Techno cleared his throat, picking his pen up yet again.

“Now, I’ve got a letter to draft. Unless you have anything else to say?” Techno raised an eyebrow, lowering it when Wilbur shook his head and scanning the lines he’d already written quickly.

“Can I stay here a while?” Techno’s eyes flickered to Wilbur briefly, processing the question for a moment.

“If you’ve nothing better to do, sure.”

Smiling, Wilbur tugged a second chair from beneath the desk, happily sitting down across from Techno and leaning forward slightly, trying to read what he’d written upside-down and mostly failing. Techno glanced up, humming to himself lightly before continuing his writing, sparing glances to Wilbur occasionally to make sure he was okay.

Maybe only a few people truly knew Techno. But if one of them was Wilbur, he’d consider that a win.


End file.
